Thirty one years today I have been married to my best friend.
Truth be told nobody gave us a chance of staying married,we were young I was 21 hubby was 23..we did things ass about…
I was pregnant with our first child and the rebellious young pair we were had people saying it was doomed.
Neither of us had come from happy homes..my parents had a fractious relationship and divorced when I was 10..hubby pretty much the same..
We did not learn about marriage from our parents…we did not learn about raising children from them either..they pretty much screwed that up on all accounts.
So we headed into marriage, as a lot of people do regardless of the age they are,blind to the meaning.
We raised four children, we educated them loved them and tried to instill in them a sense of compassion and importance of family..things we had to learn along the way with them.
At times our parents felt it was okay to ‘advise’ us on marriage…my father had re married and would re marry in total four times ..hubbies mum married again twice or three times..hard to keep track ..his dad re married..my mum stayed alone.
Forgive me if we took their ‘advice’ with a grain of salt.
We have attended funerals,buried relatives,seen one son married and another to marry Saturday,seen our kids in car accidents,in hospital with broken bones or illnesses,gone to school meetings,waved goodbye as one flew to America for three months,we have had pets,lost pets,bought and sold houses rented ,renovated,hosted parties,worked,volunteered,gone on game shows,lived with nothing for more of our lives than I care to remember,argued,debated,laughed,cried and felt such sorrow at times we thought we would die from broken hearts..
One thing we always have done is said I love you every day..we never go to bed angry..and I am proud to say we would do it all again..life is not meant to be a flatline..it’s meant to be lived good bad and ugly..so it is up and down and sometimes even sideways.
So after 31 years I think I can safely say I don’t need ‘advice’..i think we know what we are doing..bumbling along and working it out for ourselves seems to have worked.
I have spent more of my life with this man than anyone in the world..i love him,he makes me laugh we still are as crazy as we were when we first married..we are no longer naïve, we no longer see the world through rose colored glasses we know that marriage is an evolving situation and I can’t wait to see what else it has to teach us.
Phil I love you to bits…and I love us xxxxx Bev